I could so kick my butt, if my legs weren’t so sore right now!!
There I am, practicing dialogue with some Yogi friends over the weekend and every day since, not to mention that I had it already in my head when I came here, only to have a total black-out in tonight’s first Posture Clinic. Boy, am I mad at myself!!!!! The judges were so nice too, it’s not like Bikram, or Ida would be sitting there( both of whom I think are really great persons, but intimidating as hell)!!!! If I don’t see improvement soon I think I’ll have good reason to doubt the idea of becoming a teacher. I really have to figure out what it is that keeps coming between me presenting the dialogue how I know it, and the way how I present it. The feedback to ‘practice with fellow yogis’ doesn’t really help ‘cause that’s exactly what I’m doing without having any major issues. It was pretty much the same when delivering the Half-Moon-Pose. I so could have nailed it but didn’t. Back then I thought it was stage-fright (even though TT is so NOT the place to have that), but after tonight I begin to think that it must be something else? Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to be perfect, at least not yet, because I want to get feedback that I can work with and use to improve. But it is ultra frustrating when you know you can do it, only to find out that apparently you can’t when it counts! I really have to work this out!! I’m off to bed now, new day new luck…..I hope!!!